Lately I feel like I’ve been hearing this phrase everywhere. I hear it in podcasts, in Creative Collective meetings, and I read it in books. And every time I listen to it or read it I become acutely aware of how less of it I am doing myself!
The truth is, this year – and we are almost a full quarter into it- has already been so busy and time consuming. Do you have that practice where you think of a word and its your most important word of the year? Mine was ‘time’. My goal was to really consider how I am spending my time- have I been true to myself so far with ‘time’? Nope!
I still find myself doing lots of things that aren’t a ‘hell yes’. I still find myself doing things that are not gratifying or fulfilling, I still find myself hopelessly bored a lot of times in my life. However, I read something yesterday that changed my perspective about this.
There is no need for you to be productive
Are you the kind of person who just feels the need to be productive all the time or active all the time, just doing things for the sake of doing something? Apparently, there are many of us out there, maybe its you- the one reading this!
Really start to build more self awareness and ask yourself why you are doing certain things in your life. Is there some invisible pressure you’re putting on yourself to finish certain tasks? Why? Who is watching? Do you have to finish said task by this month’s end? What will happen if you don’t?
If you’re finding yourself torn maybe that is the real reason why you need to do the inner work
How do we do this inner work? It comes down to a few small steps.
A half hour of me time
Start by dedicating at least a half hour to yourself for journaling, thinking, meditating or praying. Slowly you might find yourself loving this ‘me time’ so much you’ll begin to crave more and more of it- and that half hour will become an hour, and then the one hour will become 2 hours on any given day of the week.
Waking up early, or not
A lot of us are dead against waking up early. I used to be one of those people who would judge others for not waking up early. However, ever since I read the book- Why We Sleep, I’ve realized that there are in general 2 kinds of people in this world, based on their naturally occurring circadian rhythms. There are early birds and late night owls.
My husband just happens to be an owl, and I a bird. The few times he has woken up early, he had always felt very distraught, unable to focus, and tired. I am just the opposite, I get so much energy as soon as I wake up that I am able to be at my most creative peak. Then slowly throughout the day I get more and more tired and overwhelmed, and by 9 o clock I am ready to tuck in. Find your circadian rhythm, respect it and time your ‘me time’ accordingly. Don’t push yourself to do something you know you can’t.
Just say no
if you’ve read previous posts of mine, you’ll hear me saying ‘say yes’ to opportunity. And, while that is true, I urge you to remain selective. Say no to things that do not move you, say no to things that you cannot give a 100% to. Say no to things that aren’t going to move your personal and professional ambitions further along.
Find your therapy friend
This could be your best friend, a spouse, or a work colleague, it could be anyone. It cannot be a therapist, although if you do have a therapist more strength to you sister! A therapy friend is a friend to whom you can rant and complain to, and she/he will still have your back after it. You feel lighter just taking to them. Sometimes, you need this person to just exist and for you to call them at any time of the day, share something unpleasant that happened.
They may not have any advice for you, but they will always say things that will make you feel better, and the act of sharing itself will make you feel a 100 tonnes lighter in the heart and mind. My therapy friend is my best friend who lives in India. We utilize Whatsapp calls to stay connected. We started this practice in the pandemic when both of us had a lot of emotions and couldn’t rally share those feelings with our immediate families (people living in the same house as us).
Exercise your mind and body
Read a book, practice yoga, go outside for a run, sweat a little. All of this will clear your mind. Make you feel better. I recently heard a podcast from a coach who said that we can’t be at our mental and emotional best if we aren’t at our health best. Eating right and exercising are just key elements that make us whole. If we are too busy to exercise for an hour, or eat a home made meal- there is something wrong about the career path we have chosen or the balance in our life. How sustainable and healthy can a life like that be? Think about it, this should give you pause to re-evaluate what you’re doing in your life and make a change.
All the best! Remember to subscribe to the blog and comment if you want to share something!