I have been thinking hard about this topic for a long time. Interestingly, I had to make certain trade offs in order to write this note on trade offs. 

What do I mean by this? Let me explain. Ten years ago, the word compromise felt like it was made for losers. I criticized it harshly. In my dictionary, there was nothing called compromise. In fact, even now it isn’t. I still have the mentality of going big or going home. I do subscribe to the notion of trade offs though. 

Making trade offs means making careful choices. And being prepared for the consequences of those choices. 

I do think that ultimately most choices pan out well. At various stages of life, you have the opportunity to realize your dreams by making certain trade offs. It’s up to you, to take those options. 

What are some of my biggest trade offs?

Trade off 1: Weekend plans 

B and I both have very busy jobs and don’t get enough time with the babies through the week. This means we may choose to lay low and spend more time with the kids over the weekend. No big plans or date nights. Perhaps just one activity with friends or family. 

This Sunday I took both the kids to Trader Joe’s followed by coffee with empanadas, while B was home working. After lunch and putting the kids down for a nap, B went back to work and I got to write. A Sunday well spent. 

Trade off 2: Friendships 

I miss spending one on one time with my friends. A coffee date or a walk with a dear friend is a joy my heart knows well. However, most of my friends are either busy raising kids or chasing big career ambitions (or both) like me. So none of us have time for each other anymore. 

We communicate over missed calls and voice notes. On the totem pole of life’s priorities, it is family, followed by work, and then sleep. It’s okay, I tell myself. I know it is temporary and friends will always be there when we all have more time to give. 

Trade off 3: Travel 

Like most of you, I too love traveling. In another life, I had a blog called the traveling dentist. It is probably still active somewhere on the interwebs. However, with the new practice opening very soon, and raising two tiny kids, making an international trip seems strenuous and unnecessary. Nights are especially hard when the kids have their sleep routine disrupted. I have great respect for families that travel with multiple littles. While I know we could sleep train our kids and get them used to living out of a suitcase, I wouldn’t know how to train myself to be comfortable being away from home. I too need the snoo, my cozy bed, a warm shower and the white noise machine. I need some basic comforts. 

There are other trade offs our family continues to make, that I won’t get into in this post. But rest assured that if you are making certain trade offs, that it aids you in the achievement of your dreams- whatever they may be. If, like mine, they are to do the best for your family and live up to your greatest potential- good for you, friend!